Kitty DrunkDrunk is starting to suspect she’s been scammed

Published August 17, 2012 by Kitty DrunkDrunk


K DD has been staring in dismay at these “wine eggs” she bought from that guy at the bus station for HOURS but they haven’t hatched yet. She’s starting to lose her buzz, dammit!  I told her maybe she should try stomping them but she just got indignant and accused me of trying to have an intervention. Don’t tell her but I’m secretly planning one anyway with my support group, “People Who Love Cats Who Love Booze More Than They Love People”.  It’s going to be an absolute bloodbath. The last time we tried an intervention she was so wasted she thought it was a Kitty DrunkDrunk celebrity roast and just kept tenting her fingers and smiling and nodding as if our complaints about her horrible behavior were actually amusing, affectionate anecdotes.


36 comments on “Kitty DrunkDrunk is starting to suspect she’s been scammed

    • K DD’s hypnotic charms are indeed mighty, M U M. How K DD and I love to listen for your little footsteps pitter-pattering across the comments page, curled up together with steaming mugs of absinthe! Thank god you keep coming back so we can keep refilling.

  • ““A man who was fond of wine was offered some grapes at dessert after dinner. ‘Much obliged,’ said he, pushing the dish away from him, ‘but I am not in the habit of taking my wine in pills.’”
    -Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin, The Physiology of Taste, 1825

    • You made MY daiquiri! And by daiquiri I mean glugging rum into a smoothie. And by smoothie I mean the dregs of the box wine mixed with a maraschino cherry I found stuck on the bottom of K DD’s filthy little pink paw pad.

    • Well there WAS that nasty rumor involving the late Master Moon and a paternity test, which mysteriously got “lost” in a “tub of baked beans” on the way to the lab, according to “authorities”. Kitty DrunkDrunk and he DO kind of have the same nose, though. Ahem.

      • Hee hee – always so much fun just watching them and when they are passed out, tickle their little kitty witty paws. And the they bite, ooooh how we like it when they bite!

    • GUUUHH??! Whoa THANKS pal! Kitty DrunkDrunk is giddy with delight. And gin, of course. She’s feeling quite grand now and is parading around in nothing but a nasty old g-string left over from her stripper days with like, one smeary sequin still attached. Hooray!

    • Hear hear! K DD has yet to discover any actual proof that drunkenness is in any way detrimental to one’s well being. Although it IS hard to “discover” anything when all you do is lie face-down on the couch in your soiled bathrobe, occasionally fumbling for the remote. But still.

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