Kitty DrunkDrunk has missed the point of the field sobriety test

Published August 6, 2012 by Kitty DrunkDrunk

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No, Kitty DrunkDrunk, you’re supposed to tilt your head back and touch your nose with your OWN finger, idiot!  Look at her! She can’t even SIT a straight line, let alone walk one! If you look out the window you will see K DD’s purloined scooter which she curb-jumped onto the sidewalk after a full day of pounding tequila with her enormous ex-cellmate from lockup. Apparently she thought she could keep pace with a 400 pound Samoan with a liver the size of K DD’s entire body and you know what? She just mighta done it if they hadn’t been kicked out of JoJo’s Paradise Lounge. It’s not HER fault that dilly broad behind the bar can’t take a joke. I mean, it wasn’t a REAL gun. They were just having a little contest for old times’ sake to see who could carve the most realistic revolver out of soap like they did back in the pokey. You don’t even want to know where the little paper umbrella was shoved when K DD came lurching in the door, singing sea shanties and doing a vulgar little hula.

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24 comments on “Kitty DrunkDrunk has missed the point of the field sobriety test

    • Don’t be fooled, that radiator is a total slut! I’ve got a whole stable of those whores in my palace. 8 to be exact and they’re always hissing and clunking about and getting overheated and whatnot like they are menopausal or something. P.S. Sometimes a Samoan is just a Samoan. (Fun fact!: I have a friend in DC who long ago lent HST his motorcycle once, which HST promptly wrecked. No lie.)

  • I am soooo glad it isn’t just me who has out of control cats! One of mine has been banned from the supermarket for shop lifting and spends all of his time driving round the village in his pimped out car upsetting the neighbours…He hangs out with this girl cat called Tulissa, who is only friends with him so she can get a lift into town….As soon as spike from 3 doors down comes round on his moped she is off………

    • I think I totally know that dude! Always hanging around the 7-11 asking people to buy him beer? And that Tulissa is a hot mess! Sorry girl but you don’t have the figure for a “lion cut”….I wonder if she knows Spike is fixed? Whatever she’s a bitch anyway.

      • That’s my boy!! mmmwwwwhhhhhaaaaa!!! What has he done to me???? He has bought embarressment on his family….how could he do this with some hussy???? Good job for his step brothers….I just hope he used protection…..

  • My cats are not so much alcoholics as they are enslaved to their addiction to the demon catnip weed. Due to their lack of opposing thumbs, however, they are unable to employ a vaporizer for their narcotic “kicks.”

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